Expenses

I wonder why this keeps happening over and over. You try to be nice to people and help them out, but in the end you're taken advantaged of. Why do people feel the need to live at the expense of others? I really find no harm in being nice, but I guess that's what most people would call stupid. But I do think that you can't help those who don't want to help themselves. I wish people would try not to take the easy way out and realize you have to work for the things you want. That's what makes things worth it, the fact that you worked for it.

Troubled Tuesday

I look back on life and just wonder to myself exactly what it is I'm here for. I truly believe everything happens for a reason and everyone's existence serves a purpose. Aside from the long days of sleep and nights of solitude, I often just imagine the life I could lead. Of course that stuff is impossible seeing that I don't possess the actual talent to do so. I can only work with what life has given me and often I feel that isn't enough for me. I mean, I'm not completely unfortunate in certain areas and do possess certain qualities others admire. But sometimes I feel it's not enough. This world is crazy and I am only beginning to understand it. Growing up has had its ups and down and I've gone through things most people wouldn't even imagine. However, I somehow managed to stay content and pleased with the outcome. I still ponder on what more life has to offer and only hope bigger and better things will be sent my way. I've developed a few hobbies and things to keep me more occupied throughout the day. This room I share with my younger brother has become somewhat bareable to what it used to be. But still, I can only wait til the day I finally have enough to set out on my own and experience what life is really like. Unemployed and living with your parents isn't exactly the fun life I imagined I'd be at when I'm 20. This year has been quite a dud though I can say I've done a lot more this summer than I have in my previous years. I can only hope by next year I can get things straightened out and live my life as I planned. I'm not hoping to be rich and successful in a year, but atleast have a stable job that pays rent and living expenses as well as a car. But hey, a new semester starts next week and I'm hoping I can start over new.